Estate Planning for Blended Families

 

Ray’s Take: Estate planning has undergone a lot of changes over the years, and one of the most significant doesn’t have anything to do with the tax laws. It is the change in family relationships. Chances are, you or someone you know is part of a blended family. This was once an uncommon situation, but in today’s world fully 42 percent of adults have some kind of step-relationship, according to Pew Research.

This state of affairs can make things extra tricky when it comes to estate planning. In these blended family situations, there are more opportunities to get it wrong, and your intentions – like your assets distributed to a current spouse, or that your children and stepchildren are treated according to your wishes – need closer attention to make sure everything is set up correctly.

One area where the wheels are most likely to come off of the best-laid plans is in beneficiary designations on retirement accounts and insurance policies. A perfect plan can be destroyed by an incorrect beneficiary designation because the beneficiary designation trumps everything else – including your will.

Another area where issues may arise is a will that leaves everything to the surviving spouse in the belief that the surviving spouse will provide for all of the children fairly and equally. That’s a lot to expect, and it doesn’t always happen in reality, and the better way to ensure the distribution of assets is to set up a trust that will handle this particular situation.

When it comes to estate planning for a blended family, the concept of “yours, mine and ours” can complicate the process to the point that family dynamics become permanently strained. The alternative is denial resulting in nothing being done, virtually guaranteeing disaster. Working through these details not only can avoid future estate planning hassles but also help maintain healthy relationships between all parties involved. A good estate attorney can help ensure things happen the way you intend.

Dana’s Take: Those of us of a certain age remember “The Brady Bunch” on TV with fondness. Who couldn’t love them?

But that’s TV, not real life. Seriously, six kids and one bathroom? Further, the show didn’t address the anger children and teens can feel when asked to share a parent, home and resources with siblings they did not choose. This is particularly difficult when a family of lesser means blends with one of greater means; issues like a teen’s first car can create fireworks.

No one can predict the way the emotions will make them feel when one parent is gone and there’s nothing in writing about where the assets are going.

Blended families can represent the beauty of new beginnings. But they can also be heartache waiting to happen down the road if solid plans are not put into place early.

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